The Expat Life: The Evolving Identity

In a few months I will have lived abroad for 6 years. 5 countries and 4 continents later, lets just say my perspective of myself and the world has drastically changed.

If you compared me in 2012 before my expat journey to me now going into my third year in Sydney, you will see a significant difference.

I believe, I have grown exponentially. I have experienced success, failure and some mediocrity or unwanted complacency of ambitions yet to be fulfilled. Through all of this, I have developed grit with a much nuanced view of the world. I am not saying I had a naive or narrow-minded view of the world before, but my view of world naturally changed after getting the chance to actually seeing it.

Like most expats, you inevitably change. Main change is how you see yourself or your self-identity.

Lupe Fiasco rhymed in his song “Gold Watch“:

I am American mentally/with Japanese tendencies/Parisian sensibilities…

That got me to thinking. How would I describe myself? Well, I came up with the below.

I am African-american mentally with British tendencies and slight Swedish sensibilities.

Not as smooth as Lupe, but I will run with it for now.

My wife Sanna refuses to allow any Norwegian influence on me as she sees that as some form of corruption. Meanwhile, it remains to be seen how much of the Aussie experience will leave a mark on me.

I am an intelligent black man (“Mr. IBM” as my mother would call me growing up and still does to this day) and that will forever be at the base of my identity and I take pride in that. Beyond that foundation is my complicated identity as an American.

Being an American of African decent, my relationship with the United States is not simple by any means. As far as I can tell, I am the fifth generation of freed slaves and along with my sister, we are the first beyond our parents to live in a “post segregation” America. Yet, America is not “post racial”. Not by a long shot. Furthermore, America has taken a Trumpian turn for the worse as American society.

I can go on but for the sake of brevity, let’s just leave it at the fact that my relationship with America has a lot to unpack.

Swiftly moving on.

I’ve had the opportunity to live in the United Kingdom for three years. During those three years, I have garnered some forms of Britishness.

Where do I start? I appreciate quirky and dry British humor and wit. Nothing like going for a pint after work (especially on Fridays). I slightly cringe when I do see a proper queue to get on a bus or train. I have said it before, but I do love a good Chippy (fish and chips shop), kebab, curry, and fry up (full English breakfast). In addition, I have become a slight tea snob (Twinings for the win).

I have lived longer in Sydney than in London. Yet, I still see myself as Londoner to this day but not a Sydneysider at this point in time. Let that marinate for a second.

I have lived with Sanna for almost five years now. Additionally, I have visited Sweden and my in-laws on numerous occasions. Because of that, I have and continue to be under the heavy influence of Swedish (and general Scandinavian) culture and thinking. You can’t help but learn a thing or two from the Nordics.

America is the most individualistic nation in the world. That is a double-edged sword that cuts deep into the prevalent successes and failures of the American “Way” or “Exceptionalism”.

Meanwhile, Sweden is more collective as a society. Some people will call them the dreaded word socialist. However, because of this collective or socialist thinking, they are some of the best countries to live in. Maternity (and paternity) leave, universal healthcare, free education (even at the university level) and a very progressive environmental policy. That is just some of the good stuff Sweden is doing and their policies have influenced my political thinking a lot more than the Brits.

Don’t get me wrong, Sweden is not a perfect place. Check out the issues of immigration, integration and xenophobia/racism. But like an à la carte menu, I pick and choose political ideas that seems to make logical sense that is best for humanity from the places I have lived or at least observed.

Wow. I didn’t expect to go that deep into political and societal commentary. Sorry for going down the rabbit hole on that one.

Back to Sweden. I love the Swedish food. They make good bread. Their crisp bread (knäckebröd in Swedish) is diverse as pasta is in Italy. Plus, they take pride in making quality food products due to their high food standards (I am looking at you US Food and Drug Administration). Because of the dark winters, Swedes love having candles throughout the house. I look up from my computer screen now and see two big candles within view. And Sweden and Scandinavia for that matter has some of the most beautiful slices of nature from the mountains to the coast and islands a person can see.

I can go on but I want to go another point. After living abroad, my bias to products and brands has changed. I was predominantly American in this area. However, my personal list of favorite products has expanded and diversified.

I write this because, naturally the brands you are loyal to also speaks of your identity.

Going back the song “Gold Watch” by Lupe, he says:

I like Diptyque candles and Maharishi sandals and
Dita sunglasses, Purple Murder Service samples
I like False T-shirts Dover Street is off the handle
Such a good designer, Junya Watanabe, god damn you
I like Yohji Yamamoto and a Max Roach solo
Leather Gucci belts and Guilty Brotherhood polos
I like Montblanc pens and Moleskine paper
I like Goyard bags and green Now and Laters
Monocle magazine and Japanese manga
Futura Nosferatus and HTM trainers
I love Street Fighter 2, I just really hate Zangief
Only Ken and Ryu, I find it hard to beat Blanka
Keep a Wee Ninja hanging and an UNKLE album banging..

Don’t get it twisted, I am not over materialistic. At least I don’t think I am. Actually, living abroad and moving around quite a bit has forced to me stay lean with items and only travel with the essentials. So I want to make that clear.

I do have a list of prized possessions or brands/products I trust and are go to items. I love a good Moleskine note with a quality pen. I have a Barbour bag and Fjällräven backpack plus a Samsonite weekend bag that swear by. I am still a PlayStation gamer and represent team Nike/Jordan.

I can’t go wrong with Clark shoes, or Dressmann underwear. Yes, I have become particular about my under garments. M&S cashmere jumpers (or sweaters as we call them back home in the US) and Mason Cash or Le Cruset kitchenware comes to mind as quality products I always go for if possible.

I am not name dropping to show off. More times than not, I am okay with a cheaper brand/product as longs as it actually does the job intended. But, there are just some things I just can’t go without.

I usually try to have a Moleskine near me to write any notes that I want to save.

Good or bad, based on what I mentioned above, you have formed an initial or modified an existing view of me. Yet, that’s the point. Fair or not, what I consume is an important part of my identity.

Let’s just say as cliche as it sounds, I have grown. Yes, I would have grown if I have stayed in the US and only have traveled abroad from time to time. On the contrary I think a 32 year old Michael who did’t leave for Europe almost six years ago would look very very different to the Michael you see now.

I foresee at least another 5 years or so outside the United States and this is definitely by choice. I do miss the day-to-day opportunities to spend time with my friends and family. But I don’t miss living in America and everything with comes with it. As of now, I am content with going home a couple times a year but quickly head back out when I am tired of the craziness that is Planet America*.

* I give credit of that name to the amazing US political commentary show here in Australia.

 

 

 

 

Changed Perspective: From the Expat Looking In

Here is a letter I wrote to the editor of my hometown newspaper, The Gainesville Sun. 

I wrote this letter as an expat observing the infancy of the Trump Administration and overall explaining my feelings on America as it is in the global community.

This is my letter below (here is the link of the letter on the newspaper site):

I have had the amazing opportunity to live abroad in multiple countries including my current residence in Australia. If you talk to anybody who has lived outside of the US for a decent period of time, you will notice that person’s American identity has forever been warped and changed. Your viewpoint of the perceived “greatness” of America changes and a brutally honest perspective is formed.

Then again, America’s greatness has always been limited. Ask any minority group.

President Trump is a caricature of the societal norm of the ruthless and heartless Individualistic Capitalism parading as “American Exceptionalism”. If you really look at the history of the US, there are stories of soaring greatness in both achievements and atrocities. However, I am still a proud American and after seeing some of the World, I know America can be truly exceptional if we are willing to change our thinking as a nation.

Michael L. Byrd, Gainesville (Sydney)

The Expat Life: Home Cookin’

“You don’t know what you have until it’s gone.”

I think that statement rings true when you move abroad.

Moving abroad is a great opportunity for new cultures, new experiences and new food.

However, there are moments where you just want a good burger and fries or some other food you grew up with back home. My word, the list of food I have enjoyed and loved growing up is long and wondrous.

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Gator Tail: Common in my home state of Florida (Photo Courtesy: Food Network)

I am from Florida. Because of Florida’s history and location, there is an abundance of different cuisines that either developed there or moved in with the growth of the state over the past 100 years.

Just to give you an idea of what I am talking about, let me list to you some of the food that is available:

  • Jamaican
  • Mexican
  • Bahamian
  • Cuban
  • Brazilian
  • Peruvian
  • Cajun/New Orleans
  • Soul Food
  • Barbacoa
  • Southern/BBQ

I can go on. The overall name of this cornucopia of food is called Floribbean cuisine.

Honestly, I didn’t get a giant yearning for food from home in the first year abroad while living in London and Shanghai. However, all of that changed when I moved to Oslo. I am not saying Norwegian cuisine made me miss food that was seasoned beyond salt, pepper and maybe dill but it was at that point I just hadn’t had a good Cuban Sandwich or a bowl of Butter Pecan ice cream in quite a while.

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Oslo is a beautiful city. Just not enough BBQ available. (Photo Courtesy: Morten Falch Sortland / Getty Images)

At that point, I decided that if I want Gumbo, then I will need to make it myself. I slowly started cooking dishes I wouldn’t normally make myself. Was it a sign of adulthood? Maybe. Was it desperation for Texas Roadhouse rolls or buttermilk biscuits? Most definitely.

If I recall correctly, I developed 8-10 recipes of different types of food while in Norway.

Since then, I have added to my own personal group of recipes and when I have time I try to add to that list of dishes I can’t have until I return home on holiday.

Next challenge: Jamaican Beef Patties and/or Shrimp Po’Boys

Lessons learned so far:

  1. Unlike my wife, I am horrible at “improvising”. I have to develop a good process and make sure I have all my ingredients within arm’s reach. Luckily, I am getting better at being flexible and adapting to what I have available.
  2. Speaking of that, learn to use the ingredients available. I had to learn how to use Swedish sausage for Gumbo or creme fraiche for dessert.
  3. Thank goodness I have been able to bring grits with me where ever I go.
  4. If you can’t go out and have it, make it yourself. Give it a go.

 

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I am not British but I do love myself a proper “Fry Up”. (Photo Courtesy: Sainsbury’s)

I have lived in Norway, China, the United Kingdom and now Australia with my Swedish wife. Each place has left its mark on me. Akevitt, Swedish bread, Full English Breakfast, Kangaroo steaks, the panoply of deliciousness is something to behold. That makes the expat life something else.

However, there are moments where you just want a taste of home. For me that can simply be a Publix Sub with a glass of an “Arnold Palmer”.

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Publix “Pub” Subs. Absolutely heaven. (Photo Courtesy: Orlando Weekly)